WTAE Public Works crews began going to various parts of the city Wednesday to enforce a little-known ordinance in advance of the Penguins potentially winning the Stanley Cup Thursday night at Consol Energy Center. Guy Costa, the city’s chief of operations, said crews are removing couches from front porches, collecting abandoned furniture and emptying trash containers before Game 5 of the Stanley Cup Final against the San Jose Sharks.

We are a night away from becoming hypocrits.

We spend most of the year scoffing students down at WVU who infamously lit their couches on fire once upon and time and now we’re making mental notes of what we can set on fire around the house.

Unfortunately “The Man” is having none of that and is wrangling up all that fuel and imposing a 90 minute celebration window.

Tomorrow’s win would be the first home championship win since 1960 and they’re trying to force us all to celebrate it in the blink of an eye? Come on people.

All this means is we now have to treat this celebration like the open bar at a wedding before dinner.  No wasting time on light beers, we’re going shots only, maybe a long island here and there.

Did I mention championship gear?  The fine folks at Center Field Smoke haven’t dropped any bombs yet however if you’re into looking like a genius and wearing your Nostradamus you should be wearing their BONINOBONINOBONINOBONINO T Shirt tomorrow night.